Betulkan Niat

1st December 2010

Okay. I just have to blog about this. As a reminder for myself and for other teachers out there.

Because I feel like I'm losing myself.

I'm starting to be the teacher that everyone hates.

I feel bad. OMG. I am SO bad!

Just now I taught 11 girls swimming. It was their second class and they still haven't mastered those three basic skills; floating, bubbling, gliding.

And for some reason I became so stressed out that I turned into the teacher that me myself used to hate.

I went,

"Salah tu. Lagi sekali. Salah! Buat lagi sekali. Pergi sana, buat sepuluh." *Muka berkerut-kerut*

"Ni salah ni! Sini sekejap. Dah tengok? Hah, buatlah!"

I didn't realize my mistake until a senior lifeguard told me after class,

"Muka nak kerek gila masa mengajar... Maki-maki student."

(Okay okay, in case you didn't know what kerek is, in my definition it's actually having this bossy-hateful-arrogant expression on your face.)

OMG OMG OMG... How I hate myself now. I feel so bad!

I suddenly remembered those days where I enjoyed teaching and wouldn't mind if they are slow learners. I used to be very patient.

Then I began to think, think, think... Yes yes, mari muhasabah diri.

MONEY. That's the answer. When I started to focus on money, I began to lose my passion in teaching. I accepted Mr. June's offer to teach in the first place because I know, it's hard to get a woman swimming instructor. And I believe it's my duty to teach the girls. But as I received more students... Niat suci itu mula berubah... More students, more money. See what money can do? They can turn you into an evil swimming instructor.

BETULKAN NIAT. That's what I should do.

I shall teach my students joyfully. No more stress stress. No more tense tense.

I shall teach the ladies swimming because it's my duty as a female swimming instructor. I shall teach because if I don't, the lovely lovely girls will have to learn swimming with those male swimming instructors (yang gatal-gatal). *Okay, not ALL male swimming instructors are like that! Eheh...*

Yup, now that sounds better! I'm actually protecting those ladies from being abused by the male species. Ahah!

Happy happy swimming :)